Things You Need to Think About

There are more things you need to think about when you have cancer then you realize at first.  Not just yourself, but the support team as well.  Some of them are for your benefit, such as how you might be feeling on any given day.  For example, normally on a day where I'm feeling somewhat energetic and the weather isn't too hot, I enjoy going out with my mom.  Today however, was a day where I wanted to go, but the humidity was just killing me so I opted to stay home instead.  It's just one of those things you need to do.

As a support team member, one thing that is important to think about is the new limitations your friend may have.  It'd be nice to think that we can just pick up and go where we want to just like we always did.  Our new normal however, doesn't always allow for that.  A good example for me on this one is that I have what is called a B.A.D. infusion pump that is permanently attached to my port. What it does is give me a constant flow of Benedryl, Ativan, and Decadron, all of them to help keep my nausea in check.  Unfortunately this means changes, such as no more driving as each of them can cause drowsiness.  It also means I can't go swimming, or jump in a shower since the pump obviously would need to stay dry.

Another limitation it sets on me is that it needs to be changed out weekly.  For the most part that isn't such a bad thing, but it does pretty much mean I can't take any long trips.  Of course if I was having a hard time and had to give myself an extra dose or two, it might need to be changed sooner.  Thankfully though the normal dose I get is enough to keep things in check, and I've only had to use a bump or two on very rare occasions. 

Some of these new changes have caused a few new pet peeves to pop up for me.  Like having to say 'No' to things that I once might have said 'Yes' to without any hesitation what so ever.  Not all of it is due to the pump however.  A good portion of it is just the limitations my body has.  Like lack of strength and stamina for doing pretty much anything.  As it is, I often need to use an electric cart when out shopping with my mother.  Walking short distances, say from my bedroom out to the living room are no problem.  Walking around a store, pretty sure I'd be flat on my back in seconds both from lack of strength and dizziness.

I've also learned a lot from my new limitations. Like not judging people like I used to when I'd see them using the above mentioned carts.  Some people it was obvious they needed them, they'd be wearing a cast or one of those walking boots after a cast comes off.  Or they'd be an elderly person with a cane resting in the basket.  Simple things that told me these people needed that cart.  Then you'd see the ones who, like I was recently accused of, just being overweight and too lazy to walk.  Naturally I wanted to say something in my defense, but not wanting to start I fight I simply said that I was using the cart.  I never considered, back before my cancer, that there could be something wrong with the other person an invisible disease if you will.  Which is exactly what cancer is.